Tit-notic Verdict

I know it’s inappropriate for me to barge into your chambers but all I ask for is 10 minutes of your time to hear me out. Tits very important you hear my side of the story, tit would be unfair to hold tit against me. So please judge, titty titty please, give me 10 minutes.
What? Are you kidding me? How disrespectful would one be to repeatedly use the word tit in front of a man of such high stature? You must be hearing things. So titty titty please, let me tell you my side of the story…
Tits. My tits have infiltrated your mind. All you can think about are my luscious, soft tits. So tit-notic, my tits put you under a deep spell. So deep I can admit my guilt and yet you will still rule in my favor. So deep that I have the ability to take your wedding ring as collateral. You are mine and will do anything I say under my tit-notic spell. And when I snap my fingers you will forget our whole conversation, ruling in my favor and acquitting me of all charges….